ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
