thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
