hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
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