the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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