I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize