with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
honey bunches of taint.
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We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
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It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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