I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
