i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
