In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
