Kiss
Puke
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
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