so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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