i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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