Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
