24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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