Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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