I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We need to rekindle our bromance
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?