I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.