so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize