are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
as a side note pls kill me
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
