Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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