from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
