I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
So gin and wine won't be happening again
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
