Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize