it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
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HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE