why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
