Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
