I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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