Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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