apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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