dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
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She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
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I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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