lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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