on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
