Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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