Will you blow on my dice?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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