Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
