Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
