i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
