You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Randomize
