I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
