What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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