So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
