I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
And the cops told us we were all naked.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize