I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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