What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Randomize
