so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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