Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
