over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
