jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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