please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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