the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Randomize
