I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize